As promised, I will now conclude my back-story, I hope you find it a good read as it concerns something about atheism that I think is a matter of concern. Let’s get started;
So I was no longer a christian and no other mainstream religion had come anywhere near convincing me so I thought ‘I guess I am an atheist’… until I met some other atheists. I want to make something clear here, I do not believe that my early atheist friends represent atheism in general, but at the time, for me, they did. I had no other points of reference. You see the atheists around me at the time were not what I would call reasonable, they put no thought into existence and what was worse, went further than simply not believing in God but stated that the non existence of God or anything that can be referred to as supernatural was an absolute fact. This troubled me a great deal because I simply did not see how anyone could know. What happens after death? I don’t know, that is the honest answer. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care if you are a theist or an atheist, you do not know and you cannot tell me what happens after death. Fine, for the most part, atheists tend to have a more informed view f the matter and, indeed, there is no reason to believe in anything as nothing has ever been indicated, but we do not know enough about every element of consciousnesses for us to make any absolute claims. Sure, I figured they were probably right, but the claim to absolute certainty made it impossible for me to relate to them. I simply could not let these people represent my beliefs. This is when I found out about the word Agnostic. It seemed to mean “someone who does not know” and it fit me like a glove. I can have expectations and ideas about existence, but as far as making any absolute claims… well I simply refused to do so, or support anyone that did.
So now I had a word to describe me. Sure in some respects it was a silly title, it could be applied anywhere to make me look like a totally spaced out headcase. Is there a God? I don’t know, never seen one. Are there other galaxies… I think so.. but.. I’ve only ever seen pictures and those can be forged so.. I guess I don’t know… Does south America exist? Darn… do I, as an agnostic have to say I don’t know here as well? Sure, I cannot see any absolute proof that would be impossible to forge that such a content exists but it seems far more likely that it does. All these things aside, I was happy to be an agnostic and I happily argued against the boneheaded atheists that all claimed certainty where they simply didn’t have it. Here was my mistake. I equated the word Atheist with someone who claims absolute knowledge about existence and, even though some of those do exist, they do not represent atheism as a whole. I spent over 10 years battling both theists and atheists alike, not beloning to either party until one day I started watching the Texas based show The Atheist Experience (see links) where one of the hosts, Matt Dillahunty was explaining how to use the term Agnostic in a productive way. Agnostic just means “no knowledge” and one can be an agnostic atheist as well as an agnostic theist. Here is the little bit of definition that I had been missing.
Being Atheist just means you do not believe in any gods, it does not mean you have to believe in the lack of them.
There is a very important differance between not believeing in God and believeing there is no God. And that is where I am today. Agnostic Atheist, that is me. Is it possible that we may discover something about the universe that proves that some kind of god exists? I guess so, but until we do I see no good reason to expect it.
I hope you enjoyed getting to know this side of me, I am still interested in your own story, please, do tell, if not in a comment then in the form of my Contact Me section. Today I will leave you with the clip that finally made me join the Atheist community.